这场戏：电话里听到坏结果
第 19 章 · 共 27 章 · 2'48"
电话开着免提，今天就是 make or break（成败在此一举）：肿瘤医生带来坏消息，肿块变大，复发的淋巴瘤 resistant to（对标准药物抗药）。听完安迪却说，这几天他都在 facing my own mortality（直面自己终有一死），想到 I might only have three months left（我也许只剩三个月），却觉得解脱。想学怎么谈重病和生死，这几句很重。
make or break（成败在此一举）
make or break 成败在此一举on loud speaker 开免提、外放resistant to 对……有抗药性tight corner 被逼到墙角、处境艰难
❝ 独白 · 9 句 facing my own mortality（直面自己终有一死）
I love you 我爱你facing my own mortality 直面自己终有一死sit in it 不逃避地待在情绪里three months left 只剩三个月
今天是 make or break（成败在此一举）。电话开着免提，肿瘤医生报出结果：PET scan（正电子扫描）显示腹腔肿块更大，not the result that any of us wanted（不是任何人想要的结果），复发的淋巴瘤 resistant to（对标准药物抗药）。医生建议 maybe it's worthwhile considering radiotherapy（也许值得考虑放疗），说 We're really in a very tight corner（我们确实被逼到墙角了）。挂了电话，两人互相打气：可以 go to a second opinion（再去听听第二诊疗意见）。安迪说，这几天 I've been facing my own mortality（一直在直面自己终有一死），想到 I might only have three months left（也许只剩三个月），可真正 sit in it（不逃避地待在里面），反而觉得 liberating（解脱）。想学怎么谈重病、怎么讲生死，这段很沉重也很动人。
A1–C2 是欧标等级。点一个等级后，比它高的卡片会变淡，播放到那里不会自动暂停。
“So it's kind of make or break today.”
所以今天差不多算是成败在此一举。
用最轻的口气说出最重的等待，一句话就把当天的分量压上桌。
it's make or break
形容关键的一天或决定时用；轻松的日常小事别这么夸张。
today is do or die ／ it all comes down to today
口语
kind of 轻读一带，make or break 三词顿开加重。
For this team, tonight's game is make or break. 对这支队伍来说，今晚这场球就是成败在此一举。
“This is clearly not the result that any of us wanted.”
这显然不是我们任何人想要的结果。
医生用 any of us 把自己也放进去，坏消息里仍留着一份并肩。
not the result that any of us wanted
宣布坏结果时用，能缓和责备；对客户别擅自替对方表态。
not what any of us hoped for ／ nobody here wanted this outcome
中性
clearly 与 not 连读，any of us 弱读成一串，句尾降调。
This is not the result that any of us worked for. 这不是我们任何人努力想要的结果。
“Yeah. I guess for the last few days, I've been facing my own mortality.”
是啊。我想，这几天我一直在直面自己终有一死这件事。
把最重的话题说得平静，facing mortality 比「我要死了」更有分量。
I've been facing ...
谈生死、重大转折时用；日常小挫折别拿它说事，会显得过重。
I've been staring my own death in the face. ／ I've been confronting my own mortality.
literary
mortality 重音在 tal，前面 facing my own 轻快带过。
After the diagnosis, she spent weeks facing her own mortality. 确诊之后，她花了好几周直面自己终有一死这件事。
“I might only have three months left.”
我也许只剩下三个月了。
用 might 和 only 把死亡说成一个可能的倒计时，克制得让人不敢接话，却正是它最重的地方。
I might only have ... left.
直面生命的期限时用，语气要极稳；在轻松场合提起会让人窒息，别用。
I may have just months remaining. ／ There might be only a few months left.
中性
I might only have 轻带，three months 重读，left 轻轻收住。
I might only have one summer left in this city. 我在这座城市也许只剩一个夏天了。
“There's got to be other alternative ways of reducing your lymphoma.”
肯定还有别的替代办法能把你的淋巴瘤缩小。
用 there's got to be 把「一定还有路」说成不容置疑的信念，是家属在绝望里最硬的支撑。
There's got to be other ways of ...
替别人打气、坚持还有方案时用，语气要坚定；对医生说会像质疑专业，收一收。
There must be another way to shrink it. ／ Other options have to exist.
口语
There's got to be 连读重推，other alternative ways 放慢，reducing your lymphoma 收住。
There's got to be other ways of cutting the cost. 肯定还有别的办法把成本降下来。
Yeah. I guess for the last few days, I've been facing my own mortality. For the first time, I've actually, gone, "You know what? I wonder what it'd be like just to go, 'I might die?'" Whereas before, it's been like, "I don't care. Whatever you say, I'm gonna make it." And it's been really liberating to sort of sit, actually sit in it and go, "You know what? I might only have three months left. I might, that might be my journey."
是啊。我想，这几天我一直在直面自己终有一死这件事。 这是头一回，我真的说出了口：「你知道吗？ 我想知道，如果直接说「我可能会死」，那会是什么感觉？ 而以前，我一直是，「我不在乎。 不管别人怎么说，我一定能挺过去。 而真正坐下来面对、待在这种念头里，说真的，反而让人特别解脱，然后说， 「你知道吗？ 我也许只剩三个月了。 也许吧，那也许就是我要走的路。
下一章 · 20made peace with想开了这场戏：劝他跟着自己的心走意思是「成败在此一举」，形容一件事的结果决定一切。台词 So it's kind of make or break today 就是「所以今天差不多算是成败在此一举」，多用于关键时刻。
字面是「面对自己的必死性」，指真正去想、去接受「我可能会死」这件事。台词 I've been facing my own mortality 就是「这几天我一直在直面自己终有一死」。
sit in it 不是「坐在里面」，而是「不逃避地待在某种情绪或处境里」。台词 it's been really liberating to actually sit in it 就是「真正坐下来面对它，反而让人很解脱」。
指「被逼到墙角、处境艰难、没什么退路」。台词 We're really in a very tight corner 就是「我们真的被逼到墙角了」，常形容选择很少的局面。
说 worthwhile considering，也可以说 worth considering。台词 maybe it's worthwhile considering radiotherapy 就是「也许值得考虑做放疗」，worthwhile 表示值得花时间或精力。
