duck beneath something
It's the first time I remember ever actively diving under something...The End of the Tour · 2015 — 第 8 / 17 章 · 5'01" · B2
Wallace Recalls His Eight Days, Explained：about as sexy as
The talk turns to Wallace's depression: the suicide attempt, the eight days at McLean's, and the feeling that he had nothing left at 28. 'I think that the not very sophisticated diagnosis is that I was depressed,' he says. Then the book tour begins, and the interviewer is told to press him about the heroin rumors.
あらすじ
Back at Wallace's home, Lipsky asks about the suicide watch and McLean's. Wallace describes the eight days he spent there, the drinking and running he used to cope, and an ego tied to writing. The film then jumps to Minneapolis, where Patty Gunderson drives him to his hotel, and his editor phones to push him on the heroin rumors.
注目の表現
fucked upsuicide watchtied up inmove on
00:00 / 05:01Space 再生 · ← → セリフ移動 · R リピート
いま
このシーンの表現
about as sexy as
as exciting as it ever gets
When Patty offers a sightseeing stop, Wallace deadpans that this is the tour's peak of excitement.
Washing dishes is about as sexy as chores get.
このシーンの他の表現
- fucked up
badly damaged
- suicide watch
close monitoring against self-harm
- tied up in
completely bound to
- move on
leave the past behind
- escort
a guide, or a paid companion
このシーンのメモ一覧
95 行のセリフに 29 件のメモ
relative clause: A reduced relative clause after the first time tells us this is the first instance he can recall.
It's the first time I remember ever actively diving under something...In American speech the t in pretty often flaps toward a d.
Did you think you were done? I thought life was over. I was pretty sure.close monitoring against self-harm
Lipsky asks whether the episode came after Wallace was placed under close watch, pushing hard.
And was this after your suicide watch?a filler phrase — A filler while thinking; avoid it in speeches.
And I, you know...conditional with fronting: The if-clause sets up a hypothetical, and it was me lands the grim punchline.
I knew that if anyone was fated to fuck up a suicide attempt, it was me.in one's twenties
So there you are. You're still in your 20s.close to thirty
My late 20s. Okay, your late 20s.completely bound to
Wallace admits his sense of self was completely bound to his writing back then.
Okay. At that point, my ego was all tied up in my writing.all right, moving on — Spoken to open or switch a topic; not formal.
Okay. At that point, my ego was all tied up in my writing.leave the past behind
Quoting a character, Wallace says he is not ready to leave an old chapter of his life behind.
I don't want to move on."Want to often collapses to wanna in fast speech.
I don't want to move on."feel trapped
And I felt stuck.noun clause after like: Like introduces a whole clause here, framing a feeling as a comparison.
It was like I felt my life was over at 28, and I felt really bad.all kinds of
I did not want to feel that, so I did all sorts of stuff.drink a lot
I would drink real heavy.really heavily — Street use of real for very; keep really in writing.
I would drink real heavy.vulgar slang for sex — Vulgar; never use it in polite speech.
I would... fuck strangers.drastic measures
"I will fix this somehow by taking radical action" sort of thing.come and collect me
By the way, an escort is supposed to pick me up...be expected to
By the way, an escort is supposed to pick me up...accompany me to
and escort me to the reading.as exciting as it ever gets
When Patty offers a sightseeing stop, Wallace deadpans that this is the tour's peak of excitement.
Trust me. This is about as sexy as the tour gets.have a short sleep
All right, man. I'll see you soon. I'm gonna take a nap.gossip about drug use
What does he say about the heroin rumors?have not reached it yet
I haven't gotten to that.push him for an answer
On the phone the editor tells Lipsky to stop stalling and push Wallace about the rumors.
David, you gotta press him. Okay.Run the end of gotta straight into press.
David, you gotta press him. Okay.have got to — Spoken shorthand; too casual for formal writing.
David, you gotta press him. Okay.「Wallace Recalls His Eight Days」を読み解く
What's really going on
The scene lets Wallace describe his own collapse without asking for pity. He says the plain diagnosis 'is that I was depressed,' then explains how his whole self-worth was 'tied up in my writing,' the only place he got any 'food pellets from the universe.' The hospital detail is specific and unglamorous: eight days at McLean's after a suicide watch. Just as the confession ends, the film cuts to the tour, where the same life is repackaged as a publicity event — an escort, a hotel room, a reading. The editor's quick reminder to ask about the heroin rumors shows how the world wants the story, not the person.
Theme
IdentityWallace says his ego was tied up in his writing, the one thing that gave him validation, which is what made the collapse so total.
AmbitionHe traces the pain to his desire to become a successful literary person, and the tour turns that ambition into a promotional machine.
このチャプターで学べること
- Wallace tells his darkest years with comic timing.
- The driver's small talk shows the tour is mostly logistics.
- The editor wants the rumor; Lipsky hesitates to ask.
- Move on here means letting an old self end.
発音のポイント
- pretty sure — In American speech the t in pretty often flaps toward a d.
- want to — Want to often collapses to wanna in fast speech.
- gotta press — Run the end of gotta straight into press.
It's the only thing that I'd gotten any, like, food pellets from the universe for.His image for why writing consumed him: it was the only activity that ever gave him a reward.
I knew that if anyone was fated to fuck up a suicide attempt, it was me.His dark joke about his own attempt: even his self-destruction felt doomed to go wrong.
Trust me. This is about as sexy as the tour gets.Patty's deadpan joke about the book tour: this is the peak of its glamour.
I think that the not very sophisticated diagnosis is that I was depressed.Wallace's blunt, unromantic summary of what he went through, refusing to dress it up.
このシーンについての質問
Why was Wallace in McLean's?
By his own account he was probably afraid he would do something stupid, so he was kept there after a suicide watch. The eight days at McLean's is the concrete episode Lipsky asks him about.
Why did Wallace feel trapped at 28?
He had poured his whole self into writing, the only thing that ever rewarded him, and when that stage ended he felt his life was over. He calls it, without drama, depression.
How did Wallace cope before the hospital?
He drank heavily, slept with strangers, and sometimes quit drinking entirely to run ten miles every morning, a very American attempt to fix things by taking radical action.
Why does Lipsky's editor tell him to press Wallace?
The editor wants the heroin rumors addressed and considers that the real story. Lipsky hesitates because he likes Wallace, but the editor insists.
What changes when the film cuts to Minneapolis?
The intimate confession ends and the tour machinery begins: Patty Gunderson drives the two writers around, checks them into a hotel, and jokes about the city's one famous statue.
人生はローリングストーン · 全 17 章
すべて見る →
次のチャプター · 第 9 章all downhill from hereWallace Reads at The Hungry Mind
第 1 章once in a generationLipsky Pitches the Wallace Story
第 2 章out of respectDave Wallace Doesn't Drink
第 3 章shape the impressionWallace and Lipsky First Meeting
第 4 章channel surfingWallace on Why We Feel Empty
第 5 章comes with the territoryWallace on Why He Isn't Married
第 6 章in a heartbeatDave Wallace Offers Lipsky a Room
第 7 章security blanketLipsky Asks About the Bandanna
再生中 · 第 8 章about as sexy asWallace Recalls His Eight Days
第 9 章all downhill from hereWallace Reads at The Hungry Mind
第 10 章make eyes at someoneWallace Calls Lipsky's Girlfriend
第 11 章self-absorbedWallace on Being Shy and Egotistical
第 12 章come on to someoneWallace Tells Lipsky to Stay Away
第 13 章fauxWallace and Lipsky's Parking Lot Fight
第 14 章sleepwalk throughWallace Fears Liking the Attention
第 15 章autobiographicalLipsky Asks Wallace About Heroin
第 16 章spiritual crisisDavid Foster Wallace on Depression
第 17 章put my foot downWallace Dances at a Baptist Church第 8 / 17 章 · 残り約 35 分