“I have a hangover that is a real museum piece.”
Why it's great
It turns a miserable hangover into a collector's item, Parker's wit in one line.
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literary
Use it yourself
I have a headache that is a real museum piece today.
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Lee Forges Dorothy Parker Letters, Explained
Can You Ever Forgive Me? · 2018
Chapter 6 of 14 · 3'05"
Alone in her apartment, Lee is writing Dorothy Parker letters that Parker never wrote. The voice is pitch-perfect and self-mocking: "I have a hangover that is a real museum piece." Every joke, every signature "Yours, Dorothy Parker," is a product — and the scene watches her enjoy making it.
Key moments
Start here, then watch the full scene- 1:00–1:36
Lee Calls the Agency as Nora Ephron
36s - 2:09–2:51
❝ Monologue · 6 lines Lee Writes a Fake Dorothy Parker Letter
42s
Lee Forges Dorothy Parker Letters, explained
What happens
In her apartment, Lee types out forged letters in Dorothy Parker's voice, inventing a hangover, a mock apology, and a joke about California. She also makes phone calls under famous names, impersonating Nora Ephron to get past an agency receptionist. The letters are meant to fool dealers, but the scene lingers on how much fun she is having writing them.
What's really going on
The jokes are the point. Lee is a broke, difficult writer with a gift for mimicry, and the forgeries let her be the author she never got to be. "I have a hangover that is a real museum piece" is her own wit, hidden inside someone else's name. The phone calls run the same scam on a smaller scale: pretending to be Nora Ephron gets her treated like a celebrity for a minute. What she cannot get honestly, she takes by impersonation, and the scene never lets us forget how good she is at it — which is exactly what will land her in trouble.
Key lines & what they mean
- “I have a hangover that is a real museum piece.”
- Lee's comic exaggeration: her hangover is so spectacular it belongs in a museum, a sample of her wit in Parker's voice.
- “But until I do that, can you ever forgive me? Dorothy.”
- The punchline of the mock apology — she asks forgiveness for the very letter she is writing, then signs Parker's name.
- “Well, I'm here to tell you there is.”
- Her reply to Gertrude Stein's famous line about there being no "there" there: a confident joke that proves she can write in Parker's register.
- “Is that one word or two?”
- A dry comeback to being called a star fucker, deflecting the insult by quibbling over spelling.
- “A tragic loss, but she had been dying for decades.”
- Even her fake condolence has a punchline, summing up Parker's signature blend of grief and dark humor.
Theme
- Deception — Lee forges letters and impersonates celebrities on the phone, passing her own writing off as other people's.
- Identity — The forgeries let a broke, overlooked writer briefly become the famous voices she admires.
What this chapter teaches
Teaching points
Review right after watchingMy level1/8
A1–C2 is the CEFR scale. Cards above the level you pick fade, and playback will not auto-pause on them.
Language points
Click a card to jump to its moment in the videoGolden lines
A great line in its own right — why and how to use it“But until I do that, can you ever forgive me? Dorothy.”
Why it's great
The solemn plea lands as a joke, which is exactly how Parker signs off.
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literary
Use it yourself
I missed your party again, can you ever forgive me?
“Well, I'm here to tell you there is.”
Why it's great
It answers a famous wisecrack with a short, confident contradiction.
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Neutral
Use it yourself
People say the shop closed, but I'm here to tell you it's open.
“Is that one word or two?”
Why it's great
Responding to an insult with copyediting is the driest possible comeback.
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Informal
Use it yourself
Is that one complaint or two?
“A tragic loss, but she had been dying for decades.”
Why it's great
Mock mourning with a delayed punchline: the eulogy turns into a roast.
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literary
Use it yourself
A real shame, though he was retiring anyway.
Monologue
One character carrying the scene — shadow the whole passage❝ the forged apology letter
Dear Joshua, Alan told me to write and apologize. I have a hangover that is a real museum piece. I'm sure I must have said something terrible. To save me this kind of exertion in the future, I am thinking of having little letters run off, saying "Can you ever forgive me? Dorothy." But until I do that, can you ever forgive me? Dorothy.
It strings a hangover, an apology and a signature into a letter that sounds exactly like Parker.
Up next · 07the real thingThe scene: Lee Meets Anna at the BarTakeaways
What you walk away with- A forged letter can sound more sincere than a real apology.
- Being told someone is unavailable is a soft but firm no.
- Parker's wit turns a hangover into a museum exhibit.
- The pose works until a receptionist simply says no.
People also search
Questions, then the linesWhat is Lee actually doing in this scene?
She is forging letters in Dorothy Parker's voice and making phone calls under famous names. The letters are meant to be sold to dealers as the real thing.
Why does Lee impersonate Nora Ephron on the phone?
It is a way to be treated like someone important. Claiming a famous name gets her past the receptionist after she was brushed off as herself.
What does "a real museum piece" mean?
It is a joke: her hangover is so bad it seems like a rare antique worth preserving. She uses the phrase to make self-pity sound funny.
Are the Dorothy Parker letters real?
No. Lee writes them herself, copying Parker's voice. The joke and the apology are Lee's inventions, signed with Parker's name.
What does Lee plan to do with the letters?
She writes them to pass off as authentic Parker material, the start of a scheme to sell forgeries to book dealers and collectors.