Chapter 12 of 13 · 3'36"
Jack tells Ally about the night he tried to kill himself as a boy, using a belt on the ceiling fan: the fan tore out of the ceiling, and his drunk father never noticed the cut. Later, at home, Ally asks whether a sober Jack still wants to come back to her.
❝ Monologue · 13 lines Bobby's ceiling fan story
The flat delivery makes the childhood pain land harder than any outburst.
Ally Asks If Jack Will Come Home
Jack tells Ally a childhood story: his father loved the blues, his brother was away trying to make it, and he was alone with his dad. He took a belt, hung it on the ceiling fan, and tried to end his life; the fan ripped out of the ceiling instead. Later, at home, Ally asks if he will come back after the tour and whether he still wants her sober.
The ceiling fan story is told as a joke, and that is the point. Jack says 'I was more mad about that than it not working' — the failed attempt is funny, the cut is what stuck, because the cut was proof and his father was too drunk to see it. 'He didn't even fucking notice,' he repeats, and the repetition is where the hurt lives. The second half answers the first. Ally asks, 'I wondered, without the booze, if you would want to come home,' which is really a question about whether she is loved for herself or because he was drinking when they met. Jack does not dodge it: 'Whatever I want? I wanna be with you.' The last beat turns on a song found in a notebook, something both of them can point to instead of just talking.
A1–C2 is the CEFR scale. Cards above the level you pick fade, and playback will not auto-pause on them.
“I wondered, without the booze, if you would want to come home.”
She hides a painful question inside a soft guess, and one word, booze, names the wall between them.
Neutral
“Whatever I want? I wanna be with you.”
He answers her doubt with the simplest possible line: I just want to be with you.
Informal
“I was more mad about that than it not working.”
The grammar of comparison hides a confession: the failure hurt less than the cut did.
Informal
“That fucking fan stayed on the floor for about half a year.”
It parks a suicide attempt on a fan left lying for half a year, and the black humour is pure neglect.
Informal
He was big into the blues, so... 'Cause you gotta figure, it's just me and him all day long. My brother's out there tryin' to make something of himself. So I took one of his belts. I put it around the ceiling fan and tried to do the deed. The whole fucking fan came out of the ceiling. Had a big cut on my fucking forehead. I was more mad about that than it not working. And he didn't even notice. He didn't even fucking notice. - 'Cause he was drunk? - Yeah. That fucking fan stayed on the floor for about half a year.
Up next · 13come with meThe scene: Ally Asks Jack to Come With HerIt is his way of showing her where he comes from. The story is about a childhood suicide attempt that failed because the fan tore out of the ceiling, and about a drunk father who never noticed the cut.
Because the cut was proof it had happened, and his father still did not see it. The failed attempt mattered less to him than being invisible in his own house, which is the real wound under the joke.
He is leaving for about three weeks, and she keeps asking whether he will come home. She says she wondered, without the booze, if he would want to come home, because they met while he was drinking.
Yes, and Ally says it got worse when they were together. Jack answers that he was not drunk the whole time, but the exchange shows she is still measuring whether he wants her or just the life around her.
A song found in a notebook at home. When asked about hiding love songs, the answer is that it was not hidden, it just came out on the page while they were at home together.
