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Chasing Amy · 1997 — Capítulo 7 de 20 · 3'32" · B2

The Virginity Definition Debate, Explained: up close and personal

A nervous check after an awkward night turns into a fight over definitions. "Why girls?" gets an answer; then comes "Why men?" and the reply "Because that's the standard" — after which every rule is tested until it has to be revised. The friendliness holds; the logic doesn't.

Qué pasa

Two people talk things out after an awkward night. One admits to never having seen "that kind of thing up close and personal"; the other offers friendship and invites any question. The questions start simply — "Why girls?" — then turn into a running argument over what counts as virginity.

Confessing feelingsTeasingConfessingExplainingFriendsB2mediumamerican
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Atento a

weird someone outup close and personaltake a while to processof some sort

00:00 / 03:32
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Expresión de la escena

up close and personal

directly and personally

Someone explains that the scene was new rather than repellent, and that seeing it so directly took time to absorb.

I had never seen a street fight up close and personal until last night.

También en esta escena

  • weird someone out

    make someone feel awkward

  • take a while to process

    need time to digest

  • of some sort

    of a certain kind, unspecified

  • stricken from the record

    remove from the official record

  • once-in-a-while thing

    something done occasionally

Todo lo marcado en esta escena

26 notas en 63 frases

Expresión · B2weird someone out

make someone feel awkward

Someone opens by testing whether last night made the other person uncomfortable; the tone is tentative, waiting for a denial.

I weirded you out the other night.
Expresión · B2up close and personal

directly and personally

Someone explains that the scene was new rather than repellent, and that seeing it so directly took time to absorb.

I'd never seen that kind of thing up close and personal before.
SonidoI'd never

Let the d in I'd almost vanish; keep never as the stressed word.

I'd never seen that kind of thing up close and personal before.
Expresión · B2take a while to process something

need time to sink in

It just took a while to process.
Expresión · B1or something like that

or something similar

And it's not because I'm a man-hater or something like that.
Jerga · B2man-hater

a derogatory label for a man-hater — Use it to quote a label, not to insult someone to their face.

And it's not because I'm a man-hater or something like that.
Expresión · B2be exposed to something

come into contact with

/t's just been some time since I've been exposed to a man that didn't...
Expresión · B1of some sort

of a certain kind, unspecified

Explaining why men do not attract her, someone says the men she meets slide straight into some ready-made type; the tone is wry and tired.

immediately live into a stereotype of some sort.
Expresión · B1feel comfortable with someone

feel at ease with someone

And I want you to feel comfortable with me, because I'd really like us to be friends.
Sonidowant you

Run want into you without a hard break; keep the phrase light.

And I want you to feel comfortable with me, because I'd really like us to be friends.
Expresión · B1the only reason (that) ...

the sole reason

If that's the only reason you're attracted to women...
Expresión · B1be curious about something

want to know about something

So you've never been curious about men?
Expresión · B2the opposite sex

the other sex

until they've had intercourse with a member of the opposite sex.
Gramática · B2until they've had intercourse

until-clause: The until-clause sets the boundary: virginity lasts up to the point when intercourse has happened.

until they've had intercourse with a member of the opposite sex.
Expresión · B2again with your + noun

not that again

Again with your standards.
Expresión · B1make love

have sex

I think virginity is lost when you make love for the flrst time.
SonidoWhat do you

In fast speech What do you blurs; land the beat on want.

Because that's the standard. What do you want me to tell ya?
Expresión · B2according to someone's definition

by your definition

Hence, according to your deflnition, she'd still be a virgin.
Expresión · C1have something stricken from the record

remove from the official record

During the definition fight, someone uses courtroom language as a joke to demand that a childish remark be removed; the tone is dry and cutting.

I move to have that remark stricken from the record, on account of it makes you come off as completely naive and infantile.
Expresión · B2come off as + adjective

seem or appear

I move to have that remark stricken from the record, on account of it makes you come off as completely naive and infantile.
Gramática · B2have that remark stricken

causative have: have + object + past participle means arranging for the remark to be removed; here it mimics courtroom procedure.

I move to have that remark stricken from the record, on account of it makes you come off as completely naive and infantile.
Jerga · B2for Christ's sake

an exasperated exclamation — Fine among close friends when venting; avoid it in formal or religious settings.

Our bodies are built to pass a child, for Christ's sake.
Expresión · B2in that good way

in a pleasurable sense

- Sure, but in that good way. - Oh.
Expresión · B2a once-in-a-while thing

something done occasionally

Someone describes a sexual practice as occasional and set aside for special occasions, drawing a private line while keeping the tone casual.

And it's only a once-in-a-while thing reserved for really special occasions.
Expresión · B2be reserved for something

set aside for

And it's only a once-in-a-while thing reserved for really special occasions.
Gramática · B2reserved for really special occasions

past-participle modifier: The past-participle phrase modifies thing: the occasions are the ones reserved for special use.

And it's only a once-in-a-while thing reserved for really special occasions.

The Virginity Definition Debate, explicado

What's really going on

Under the friendly framing — "I want you to feel comfortable with me, because I'd really like us to be friends" — the conversation is a negotiation about what may be asked and who gets to define things. One side offers openness and an open invitation to ask; the other keeps testing the terms. "Because that's the standard" is the whole argument in miniature: a rule is invoked, an exception is produced (rape, a fence post, emotional penetration), and the rule has to be revised on the spot. What sounds like banter is two people finding out how the other thinks, and how far they can push before the ease runs out.

Theme

IdentityOne answer to "why girls?" is simply "girls feel right" — desire stated as fact, not argued.
FriendshipThe offer comes with an open door: "if there's anything you wanna know, it's okay to ask me."

Escucha con atención

  • I'd never — Let the d in I'd almost vanish; keep never as the stressed word.
  • want you — Run want into you without a hard break; keep the phrase light.
  • What do you — In fast speech What do you blurs; land the beat on want.
I haven't liked a man in a long time.

A confession framed as reassurance: the attraction is rare for the speaker, which makes it a compliment rather than small talk.

And I want you to feel comfortable with me, because I'd really like us to be friends.

It sets the terms: the awkwardness stays on the table, but the relationship being offered here is friendship.

I think virginity is lost when you make love for the flrst time.

A working definition, offered seriously, that immediately becomes the thing the other person takes apart.

I move to have that remark stricken from the record, on account of it makes you come off as completely naive and infantile.

Courtroom phrasing used as a joke: the remark is so naive it should be deleted from the conversation entirely.

And it's only a once-in-a-while thing reserved for really special occasions.

A way of saying something happens only now and then, kept for occasions special enough to deserve it.

Preguntas sobre esta escena

Why does the conversation keep restarting as an argument about definitions?

Because each definition gets tested against a case it cannot cover: "But rape is not the standard," "Then I lost my virginity at ten." Every exception forces a revision — "Okay. Second revision."

Why does one of them bring up falling on a fence post at ten?

It is a counterexample: if virginity is lost when the hymen is broken, then "I lost my virginity at ten" follows, and the definition has to be rewritten again.

Why does lesbian sex come into the argument?

Because the definition rests on penetration — "Well, where's the penetration in lesbian sex?" The question shows a rule built on one kind of sex failing to describe the sex under discussion.

Why does the courtroom language show up in a private argument?

It borrows legal phrasing to treat a remark as evidence that can be deleted: "I move to have that remark stricken from the record," followed by the reason that it makes the other person "come off as completely naive and infantile."

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Capítulo 7 de 20 · quedan unos 46 min