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❝ 名独白 · 27 行 · B2

There's this serial burglar and, uh...

The peanut butter story · Training Day (2001)

There's this serial burglar and, uh...

1 / 27 行

A real slickster, gave up nothing.

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全セリフ · 27 行

1There's this serial burglar and, uh...
2A real slickster, gave up nothing.
3Captain's riding my ass the entire time.
4Sentencing was today.
5Judge is female.
6That's right, Landers.
7Yeah, I know Landers. She's a sharp lady.
8No.
9So before the hearing,
10Guy gets hold of some peanut butter. Packs his ass crack with it.
11What?
12Then he's standing tall before the bench.
13And he's waiting to give his statement. So he shoves his hand down his pants.
14Comes out with a gob of extra Chunky Jif.
15Bailiffs won't come near him.
16Now he's... Now he's looking the judge right in the eyes.
17And licks his fingers clean.
18Holy shit!
19So the judge says, uh, Oh, this poor man's insane. He can't go to prison.
20Orders him to psychiatric.
21She fell for it.
22Yeah, that's because she's so fucking smart.
23Time she found out it was sandwich spread. The order was signed, the guy's been transferred.
24Proceedings closed.
25Yeah, closed.
26That prick will do 6 months in the puzzle factory. Then they'll call him normal and let him loose.
27Never ever do a day in prison.

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The tale grows more absurd until the punchline lands as a cold fact.

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riding my ass fell for it so fucking smart prick

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